Penny Lane

That's the name of my new car!!!

Not your typical guy.

Mom and I are sitting at the kitchen counter struggling over how to work this new video camera my sister got. I look up, and my dad has the instruction manual open to the exact page we needed thus saving us twenty minutes of further frustration.

Contrary to most, he's always been the guy to read the instructions before attempting to assemble something, and the one to stop and get directions at the first sign of being lost.

He likes things done right.

Something old, something new, something borrowed...

Something Blue.

Her bridal shower was themed around her favorite color, and oh did we have a sweet time. The girls of her closest friends, family, and family to be joined to shower her with love and gifts just a couple days before her big day. (The army negligee is from her sister-in-laws. Classic)

In just a couple days she was to be an absolutely glowing bride.

You know you love someone when...

... you will give them a sponge bath, floss their teeth, get up at the crack of dawn to get them to the doctor, and put and tuck them in bed.

After all, he is my dad (and had to change my diapers).

My afternoon into evening.

Took the dog in to the vet not knowing why her owner wanted her to go in. Picked her up to have her poop in my car. Had a door slammed in my face resulting in my tumbling down the stairs backwards. In place of an apology, received accusation of always making her feel like she does everything wrong. This turns in to my being yelled at for fifteen minutes by a thirteen year old girl. 

Hear that there is more to be fixed in dad's surgery than initially expected.

Go hang out and watch basketball with the guys, have guacamole and sopapillas for dinner, eat chocolate, and go home to relax on the sofa.

Thanks to my sweet friend for the reminder that the good in my life is so much greater than the little bumps.

The Green House Effect

That's what they call the house. It's my Boulder haven. I come, relax, and enjoy every minute. The guys are my family and I rest under their wings. What a beautiful town and amazing feeling of peace. 

Oh Holy NIght

My middle school choir had their Christmas concert last night. It was -2 degrees outside, they were rowdy as usual, and they sang wonderfully. The audience of parents loved them, naturally, and once my hands and knees stopped shaking I took a deep breath as pride overtook me.

Maybe it's the coffee

So I have the house to myself over our winter break. It stays clean, but feels empty. I've been talking to myself all morning, and just now realized it. Haha. (I think it's the caffine.) 

I'm really starting to miss my girls and their sweet, enthusiastic personalities. It's not quite home without them. 

I'm not that old...

We played pictionary in my fourth and fifth grade class today. One student was assigned to draw a telephone. Once he began drawing the guesses started flying: Cricket! Blackberry! Verizon! At&t! Cell Phone! Wireless! iPhone! Etc.

Seriously!! They were nearly out of time before someone guessed just a telephone. These kids are nine, and this world is changing quickly. 

kuh-myoo-ni-key-shuhn

com⋅mu⋅ni⋅ca⋅tion: the imparting or interchange of thoughts, opinions, or information by speech, writing, or signs

I'm forever attempting to perfect my skills in this area. Thank you for your patience.

Back to reality...

I was up at the crack of dawn desperately watching the news, hoping for a snow day. I felt like I was eight again. 

We do have a delayed start, but unfortunately I have no idea what that means for my teaching schedule. Haha.

For now, however, I have to strap on the old boots and get the sidewalk shoveled. I'm thinking a hot cup of cider will follow that exquisitely. 

On the street where you live.

My sweet little home all covered in snow. What a beautiful, snowy, Colorado morning!

What does grief look like?

Last night, it looked like me muttering to myself with bloodshot eyes that were constantly welled with tears, while my friends sat by me wondering what was wrong with me and what they could or should do. I was unrecognizable to myself.

Death hurts. Excrutiatingly. Thank God for His peace. 

Grief

by Gwen Flowers

I had my own notion of grief.

I thought it was the sad time

That followed the death of someone you love.

And you had to push through it

To get to the other side.

But I'm learning there is no other side.

There is no pushing through.

But rather,

There is absorption.

Adjustment.

Acceptance.

And grief is not something you complete,

But rather, you endure.

Grief is not a task to finish

And move on,

But an element of yourself-

An alteration of your being.

A new way of seeing.

A new definition of self.

Splash

I dropped a cookie in my glass of milk and ended up covered in milk. Oops. 

Okay, that's enough of the play by play of my evening with my cookies. Hee.

Almost Burnt

Whoops...I almost burned the cookies. Luckily, though, I realized in time. Now I have them on a plate next to me and a glass of milk. I'd better ski hard tomorrow if I'm planning on eating these ;-).

Let it Snow!

Sitting on my couch, cookies baking in the oven, houses lit all down the street with Christmas lights, and the most beautiful snowfall out the window. 

This truly is an amazing time of year. 

Welcome to my gingerbread house!! Eat up :-)

Thankful

For my Lord, for love, for my family, for my friends, for the opportunities that lie before me, I am humbled by and thankful for all that I have.

Happy Thanksgiving!

It's the little things

He was waiting for me at the airport with white lilies in hand. They weren't easy to find, but he found me worth the effort. 

It's good to be home. 

That's my uncle Regee!

So beautiful in so many ways.

How lucky am I?

That's right, he hugged me! I don't know that I gave him much of a choice...but I don't care how little of a snuggler he is; we are a letter away from having the same name and played all afternoon together. He may not be a hugger, but I am :-).

She's All Growed Up...

I can't believe it! They're getting married in only a month.

She's my sister and friend and we've been through so much. Now I get to stand there on her wedding day.

Love you Kasia and congratulations to both of you!!!

The Three of Us

Just Me and My Bro

We've always been good buddies :-)

Family

Most would be in agreement with the statement that friends and family are the most important aspect of the world we live in. Regardless of one's religion or background, everyone is impacted more by relationships than by any other single thing.

Recently I have been reminded of the reality of the finite duration of time that we have been granted to live on this earth and develop and enhance relationships. Though we hold those that we love so close to our hearts for the entirity of our existence, their physical presence and personal involvment in our lives last for such a short while. How easy it is for us to grow so involved in our daily schedules and routines and allow more time to pass than ever intended, thus forcing the delay of any reaquaintence with those we hold so dear.

The maintenence of any relationship requires sacrafice and effort, yet there is rarely an occasion when the resulting joy does not remove any thought of it from mind.

So Cute!

My girls and our first grade dance party--yeah, we know how to have fun!

Friends are Friends Forever

Yeah...so that would be Kei-Chi, Brianna, Jenae and I at my birthday party. Good friendships really do last.

Close Enough

Anna got a puppy...the two of us get along really well.

She's not mine, but I like to pretend. 

Hahaha

This kid, really?

My baby brother is learning to drive. WHAT!!??

I walked out the front door and had to do a double take when seeing him sitting in the driver seat with the car running.

First his voice drops two octaves, then he has hair on his legs, and now he's driving!!

So that's where it came from

"Inch by inch, row by row,

Gonna make this garden grow.

All it takes is a rake and a hoe,

And a piece of fertile ground.

Inch by inch, row by row,

Someone bless these seeds I sow.

Someone warm them from below,

'Til the rain comes tumblin down."

I have wonderful, vivid memories of singing this song with my mom as a young girl while getting as dirty as possible working out in the garden and digging for worms with her. 

Though I titled my blog after this as a metaphorical parallel of my life, today I re-exerienced what an incredible thing the literal application remains.  

I'm watching my mom right now wash and peel carrots that I saw her dig up from her garden an hour ago. They're sweet, perfect, and plentiful. What a simple, beautiful miracle this is that remains far beyond my realm of understanding. 

Oh. And I found out today that John Denver sang this song in the Muppet Show. Classic.

No Regrets

Jenae turned 21 at the end one of my more difficult days of the quarter. But I have been there for 18 of her birthdays and couldn't imagine not celebrating her big two one.

Wiping away my tears at 11:59, I was ready to celebrate at countdown. 

I wasn't in the mood to say the least, but by 12:15 am I was nothing but smiles. 

We have all finally made it!! 

Happy birthday sweetie!

All Better

I went to the phone store and.....now I'm back!

Plop!

It was laying on the bed next to my pillow. I rolled over and accidentally knocked it to the floor. My immediate thought was, "I don't need my phone, I'll just find it when I wake up." 

I woke up a little while later, leaned over the side of the bed and felt around for it. I accidently put my hand in a glass of water that Tim had left for me, so I had to dry it off before continuing to feel around for my phone. 

Suddenly, I realized what I had done. I put my hand back in the glass of water, and sure enough, there was my phone-- soaked with water showing no sign of working.

Oops. Don't try calling me anytime soon ;-). 

Is it worth it??

We are a relationship based species. When it comes down to it, our lives are centered around relationships: whether it's between our Creator, family, friends, coworkers, or strangers we encounter throughout our days.

Events this past week have caused me to wonder if I give those that are most important to me enough priority. In this country, and with the economy the way that it is, how much stress are we allowing to get in between us and those for and with whom we live? Is it worth it?

For myself, I have decided that for the time being, the hard work that I do now is worth it for the time that will be gained later as a result. Does this mean, however, that I can allow myself to justify or excuse any action by blaming stress? I just have to understand that as long as I am putting in the hours and energy that I do now, my level of self-control and awareness must increase. My relationships remain a priority, and as such I must care and be willing enough to work that extra bit harder to remind those that I love how important they are to me.

All that being said, thank you to all of you who have been so patient and supportive as I continue to keep a hectic schedule in investment into my education. There will soon come a time when my plate will be cleared and few items will remain. Until then, we press on step by step (love you mom!).

I think it's called stress.

Tears are falling for no apparent reason, I'm hopelessly exhausted yet unable to sleep, my appetite has disappeared, I've been easy to anger (which is not a word I frequently associate myself with), I'm constantly anxious, and it takes a lot to make me laugh.

This is not who I am. What is wrong with me??

Oh that's right, it's finals week.

Okay.....I'll Study

The house is clean and I've worked out twice. I've read a book and a magazine, written in my journal, done my laundry, curled my hair. I watched a television show, caught up on my emails, painted my nails, and bought and wrapped birthday presents.

The test is tomorrow, there's nothing left to do... Okay. I guess I'll study now.

Hushed

I'm scared of my professor. It took me until the end of the quarter to realize that that is the reason I have not been participating in class or doing as well as I should. I'm terrified of her, and as such I have avoided speaking in that class completely. I finally realized last Friday (less than a week before the quarter's end) that I actually do understand the material and can discuss it. Oops. It looks like being afraid of the big bad wolf has kept me from doing very well in the course. I should try to make realizations and over come fears like that much earlier on in the term.

Disoriented

Where could we be??


Happy birthday Jenae!

It's Okay

To laugh until you cry.
To cry to silly movies.
To feel inexplicably numb.
To have pet peeves.
To smile at the flicker and scent of a candle.
To shout out during a game.
To shriek in excitement.
To scream into your pillow.
To be nostalgic.
To fear the future.
To trip over yourself and blush.
To throw a book at the wall.
To vent.
To ache for a loved one.
To talk for hours about nothing.
To long for a hug.
To sob yourself to sleep.
To wear a smile all day just because.
To share an, "I love you."

You are who you are, created with emotions. Embrace them! It's okay.

Take a Deep Breath

There is always something to do, always work to be done. It doesn't pay the bills now, but is my investment in my tomorrow. At times work is not completed and fun is had instead, but there always remains more to accomplish.

I feel as if I live from one opportunity to sleep to the next. So many feel the same, I know. So many today are working so hard for immediate necessity and fulfillment while keeping future and ultimate goals close in mind. I am working for the life I have. For the impact I have. For the lives I touch, and those I have yet to encounter.

How can I complain? I've been blessed with incredible opportunity. I am tired now. Exhausted, in fact. But will not always be.

On occasion, I'll find myself with more than just a few minutes to utilize for relaxation. How do I spend that time that it might be cherished? I snuggle on the couch with Jenae and watch an entire disc of Friends while filling myself to the brim with pizza. Yeah. It works.

My appreciation of life would not be as such were I not obligated to work as hard as I do with the people I do.

I continue to count my blessings.

The Highlight of My Week

I'll have the basic with pumpkin pancakes, potatoes, eggs over easy, and a cup of coffee. Thanks Jeanette, you're the best!

Always putting a smile on my face.

A Little Overwhelming

What is a Middle Schooler?

What is a middle schooler?
I was asked one day.
I knew what he was,
But what should I say?

He is noise and confusion.
He is silence that is deep.
He is sunshine and laughter,
Or a cloud that will weep.

He is swift as an arrow
A waster of time.
He wants to be rich,
But cannot save a dime.

He is rude and nasty,
He is polite as can be.
He wants parental guidance,
But fights to be free.

He is aggressive and bossy.
He is timid and shy.
He knows all the answers,
But still asks, "Why?".

He is awkward and clumsy,
He is graceful and poised.
He is ever changing.
But do not be annoyed.

What is a middle schooler?
I was asked one day.
He is the future unfolding.
So do not stand in the way.

~Anonymous 8th Grade Student


Okay... Thanks for the great advice. But I have 37 of them! Lord help me.

Daddy's Little Girl

He Amazes Me

For who he is. For what he's been through. For what he goes through. For what he has done to get me where I am. I love him.

Guilty Tears

Did you clap when Simon didn't say?

No.

Then how did I see you clap your hands?

Well. Umm. Well. But I, I, I was trying (sniffle) so hard to, to do good so that I could win (sob, sob)!"

Sweetie, you can't win if you tell lies.

Then came the water works. Oh dear.